By Quinn Wharton member of the corps de ballet of San Francisco Ballet. March 5, 2010
Local students at a San Francisco Ballet Community Matinee.
These last two weeks have been a whirlwind. While Swan Lake was the beginning of the season, Programs 2 and 3 were the real dancing kick-off for me, personally. Being onstage every night is something that I haven’t done since last year and it always takes a little time to get acclimated. The difference between schedules is huge in many aspects, from what you eat and when, to how you push your body during the day. It also takes time just to get used to putting on a performance face every night. During rehearsal periods, we aren’t expected to perform every day and even during final rehearsals, while you need to project, it doesn’t have to be all the time. So switching to being on stage is almost a meditative practice. You have to come into the theater every night and remove yourself from all the bad or good that happened that day. Throughout your routine: warm-up, makeup, and getting into costume, you free your mind from distractions and focus on the character you’re portraying that evening. Of course the characters/roles range, from high to low stress, but there is always that period where you clear your mind. If you don’t, you get onstage and it can take you halfway through the performance before you transition from your introverted self to your outward, performance persona. At least we know first-hand, the definition of a stage vs. street identity. I’m sure movie stars and famous personalities have a much harder time with this distinction.
All of these musings comes to bear on the recent matinee I performed in. The Community Matinees (CMATs as they are referred to here), are special performances presented twice a year, to local elementary school children. CMATs are part of the Ballet’s community outreach efforts and a great way to experience a different audience. The children are much more moved by base emotion; they don’t have the performance etiquette or “training” that adults do, so there are constant outbursts from them which makes the performance really gratifying and fun.SF Ballet recently received a grant to further our new media efforts and technological capabilities, and the company decided to put some of this towards outreach. The idea was to stream the CMAT performance live, to a number of the schools in the Bay Area, allowing the show to be broadcast to a larger age range, which meant making the performance content more educational and behind-the-scenes. It also gave us freedom to get creative from a filming stand point. I was asked to perform some hip hop for the beginning of the show as a catalyst, a way to draw the older kids in immediately and get them to keep an open mind about ballet. I trained in hip hop early in my life and have kept up with it throughout the years, but this was very different than the regular performing I do (or the company does). It was almost more like being asked to choreograph something. I was given complete freedom as long as it got a stamp of approval in the end. I picked the music, choreographed the movement, chose my outfit, and dictated the lighting to an extent. It was such a freeing experience in a way. As a hip hop dancer, I relish the freedom of movement and I was glad not to have any boundaries. Ironically the hardest part was deciding what to wear since we usually have Wardrobe telling us what costume to put on, so the freedom of choice was almost overwhelming.
Tying back to the beginning, I realized very quickly that the mental process of this preparation was going to be very different. I was wearing regular clothes, opening the show without anything to feed off of, and my warm-up had to be completely different for what I was doing. That sort of variety really threw me off. Standing in the middle of that giant Opera House stage five minutes before the curtain went up, my heart rate began to pick up and I kept wondering if there was anything else I could do to be more prepared. I could hear all of the children right on the other side of that curtain, talking to each other; I’m sure they expected to see tutus when the curtain went up. Luckily for me, my instincts are pretty ingrained at this point. When the curtain came up and the pool of light was on me, my mind went pretty blank. I remember very little sound from the performance, even the music I had picked seemed faint. I just remember looking directly up into the spotlight as the music swelled and wondering if this is how Michael Jackson ever felt, and that it was completely worth it. It’s the rush of a thousand eyes on you alone and the feeling of total exhilaration as you let your body take over and do what it knows best. It’s like you stop thinking and processing, and just let physical memory take you from one movement to the next. My part was over before I knew it and luckily, it won’t be the last time I get this opportunity. The feedback was really positive after the show and I think it will be repeated for the other CMAT performances this year. Now I’ll be able to prepare more and hopefully enjoy it a bit more in the moment.
From Swan Lake to Hip Hop
member of the corps de ballet of San Francisco Ballet.
March 5, 2010
Local students at a San Francisco Ballet Community Matinee.
These last two weeks have been a whirlwind. While Swan Lake was the beginning of the season, Programs 2 and 3 were the real dancing kick-off for me, personally. Being onstage every night is something that I haven’t done since last year and it always takes a little time to get acclimated. The difference between schedules is huge in many aspects, from what you eat and when, to how you push your body during the day. It also takes time just to get used to putting on a performance face every night. During rehearsal periods, we aren’t expected to perform every day and even during final rehearsals, while you need to project, it doesn’t have to be all the time. So switching to being on stage is almost a meditative practice. You have to come into the theater every night and remove yourself from all the bad or good that happened that day. Throughout your routine: warm-up, makeup, and getting into costume, you free your mind from distractions and focus on the character you’re portraying that evening. Of course the characters/roles range, from high to low stress, but there is always that period where you clear your mind. If you don’t, you get onstage and it can take you halfway through the performance before you transition from your introverted self to your outward, performance persona. At least we know first-hand, the definition of a stage vs. street identity. I’m sure movie stars and famous personalities have a much harder time with this distinction.
All of these musings comes to bear on the recent matinee I performed in. The Community Matinees (CMATs as they are referred to here), are special performances presented twice a year, to local elementary school children. CMATs are part of the Ballet’s community outreach efforts and a great way to experience a different audience. The children are much more moved by base emotion; they don’t have the performance etiquette or “training” that adults do, so there are constant outbursts from them which makes the performance really gratifying and fun.SF Ballet recently received a grant to further our new media efforts and technological capabilities, and the company decided to put some of this towards outreach. The idea was to stream the CMAT performance live, to a number of the schools in the Bay Area, allowing the show to be broadcast to a larger age range, which meant making the performance content more educational and behind-the-scenes. It also gave us freedom to get creative from a filming stand point. I was asked to perform some hip hop for the beginning of the show as a catalyst, a way to draw the older kids in immediately and get them to keep an open mind about ballet. I trained in hip hop early in my life and have kept up with it throughout the years, but this was very different than the regular performing I do (or the company does). It was almost more like being asked to choreograph something. I was given complete freedom as long as it got a stamp of approval in the end. I picked the music, choreographed the movement, chose my outfit, and dictated the lighting to an extent. It was such a freeing experience in a way. As a hip hop dancer, I relish the freedom of movement and I was glad not to have any boundaries. Ironically the hardest part was deciding what to wear since we usually have Wardrobe telling us what costume to put on, so the freedom of choice was almost overwhelming.
Tying back to the beginning, I realized very quickly that the mental process of this preparation was going to be very different. I was wearing regular clothes, opening the show without anything to feed off of, and my warm-up had to be completely different for what I was doing. That sort of variety really threw me off. Standing in the middle of that giant Opera House stage five minutes before the curtain went up, my heart rate began to pick up and I kept wondering if there was anything else I could do to be more prepared. I could hear all of the children right on the other side of that curtain, talking to each other; I’m sure they expected to see tutus when the curtain went up. Luckily for me, my instincts are pretty ingrained at this point. When the curtain came up and the pool of light was on me, my mind went pretty blank. I remember very little sound from the performance, even the music I had picked seemed faint. I just remember looking directly up into the spotlight as the music swelled and wondering if this is how Michael Jackson ever felt, and that it was completely worth it. It’s the rush of a thousand eyes on you alone and the feeling of total exhilaration as you let your body take over and do what it knows best. It’s like you stop thinking and processing, and just let physical memory take you from one movement to the next. My part was over before I knew it and luckily, it won’t be the last time I get this opportunity. The feedback was really positive after the show and I think it will be repeated for the other CMAT performances this year. Now I’ll be able to prepare more and hopefully enjoy it a bit more in the moment.